Green Bean Gourmet T-Shirts

'You just had to put in fifteen hundred acres of corn when you know darn well all my casseroles call for green beans.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

French wine

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

Queen of Quinoa

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

"Can you romance me after my tiramisu?"

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

Kitchen Kapers

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

"This is locally grown and good for the environment, but it may give you greenhouse gas."

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

Cheese

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'