Greek Mythology Humorist Pillows

"I am the new Greek Finance Minister Yanis Varoufakis!"

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

"Ooh look Derek. A shooting star. Quick make a wish"

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"While you were working on fire, I was working on my satellite. Once we figure out how to launch it into the heavens, other inventions will follow, like phones, GPS, weather predictions. . ."

'On second thought, let's try it the other way around... My head on a lion's body.'

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"I miss the Augean stables."

Enterpe, Terpsichore, Calliope, and Bernie, their agent.

"Take that mammoth back. It's not 'wooly' enough."

Early on-line shopping

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

'We never had all these labour-saving devices in my young day!'

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

"....and hold the garlic."

'You can't believe a word he says since he invented the subjunctive.'

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

Hedgehog holding sign saying 'the end is nigh' as man invents the wheel.

'I'm telling you Dad: Walking upright and using tools is the way of the future...'

Carbon Dating

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"

'We had seven gloriously happy years together, and then he learned how to talk.'

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

Game time.

"We bring him gifts of gold, frankincense and mercantile mutual hedge fund options."

"Come on, Og, get with it. Everybody's putting their stuff on 'the cloud' these days."

"I like the idea, but is it scaleable?"

'Yea, I give away the fire. I make my money on insurance.'

'I made your favorite -- dinosaurkraut!'

Eurydice in prison

Garg saw the future, but didn't quite know what to do with it.

"So, Ms. Medusa. Let's talk about this fear of snakes you mentioned. Do you notice that it causes anxiety?"

'I wish we'd never invented talking — nagging was so much easier to take in sign language.'