Gratuity Guru Pillows

'I never get tipped!'

Gentleman wanting to know exactly how much he owes his butler

'How much do I tip myself?'

'Don't worry, he always feigns death when it comes to tipping.'

"First the porridge is too hot, then too cold... you're getting a lousy tip."

"Can I just leave a small tip?"

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

Van Gogh was starting to run out of gift ideas.

Cat Reunion

"Cards to remind people that you still haven’t gotten a thank you note from them"

Thank you bubbles

Santa called but you were out!

"Tia Carmen, if times are tough, how come you're giving money away?"

Regifts of the Magi

Greeting card section: 'thank you' and 'you're welcome'.

Valentines Day truck

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

'Sorry - I only donate big.'

Mother using candy cane to pull son away from toy window.

"All yours, Buddy. I'm ALREADY living on house money."

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

"By the way… If no one has mentioned this before, we think you're swell."

"In this company, Simmons, we hold our hands steady in the middle and shake our bodies."

'Can't you stop being charitable, we are on vacation.'

'I'm good. How are you?'

"I can't believe school ends in three months! Sometimes I wish it would never end. But I guess endings make you appreciate the present."

"The first step toward enlightenment is dissillusionment."

"It's an adjustment being a handshake guy in a fist-bump company."

'Times are hard so these will have to be presents for Christmas and birthday combined!'

'Oooh, I love what you've done with your hair...That top looks lovely on you and have you lost weight?'

"I do count my blessings, but then I end up counting those of others who have more and better blessings, and that pisses me off."

Honey badger do care.

Give Thanks.

Ballerina and the light switch.