Grateful Guru Pillows

"She sent me a Thank You note, so I sent back a Thank You for your Thank You note and she sent a Thank You for thanking me for the Thank You note and..."

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

"Cards to remind people that you still haven’t gotten a thank you note from them"

At the 2021 Religious Games

Cat Reunion

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

'Oh Hi!'

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

Thank you bubbles

Where 'Pastor'-ized Milk Comes From...

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

Guru.

'Wish you wouldn't cut your nails at bedtime!'

"Tia Carmen, if times are tough, how come you're giving money away?"

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

'Eat the grass in perfect circles. It drives them crazy.'

"I seek enlightenment - and a way to outsource our company's tech support."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

Complete Makeover

'I warned him about thinking the unthinkable!'

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

Greeting card section: 'thank you' and 'you're welcome'.

'The trouble is, once you've attained enlightenment, it's all downhill.'

Mood swings: Swing 1 - 'Looks like it's going to be another wonderful day!' Swing 2 - 'Who CARES link brain! I hope it rains acid!!' Swing 3 - 'I think i'm going to CRRRY!'

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

"To mediate properly, you need a mantra. How about 'Ka-Ching'?"

Sculptor's chippings

OM, SWEET OM

'Tell us what you've done with all the grass!'

Bearded old man atop mountain.

"As for the meaning of life, it doesn't have to suck."

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

"All yours, Buddy. I'm ALREADY living on house money."

Just think of meditation as "mental floss." (Published previously on 3/17/2006.)