Grateful Deadheads Gifts

Jerry Garcia, RIP

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

"The last time I heard a beat like this I was at a Grateful Dead concert."

"Folks, if you look out of your window at those clouds below, you'll have a nice view of the Grateful Dead dancing bears."

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

"Would the owner of the 1985 Ford station wagon, license plate METAL-1, please move your car so that the ice-cream truck can get through?"

"I forgot to turn on the alarm." "It's all right, Peedy is there."

"I'm just gonna do one more set."

Grim Reaper Snack Bar

Santa Metal Claus

'What do you mean - you want a white wedding?'

"Roger, give me the shirt … it’s time."

'This may be the first day of the rest of my life, but I've decided to wait for the second day.'

Counting Blessings

"The years 1966 through 1995 are blank because I was on tour with the Grateful Dead."

Heavy Metal Scrap Merchants.

'We realise that your speciality is heavy metal...'

Musical Mestizo.

'Air guitar 101.'

The Barbarian At the Villiage Gate

Heavy Metal Scrap Merchants.

Don't forget to switch off your cellphones.

'Darling, it's the local Satanists wondering whether they can sing us some black metal.'

"I thought it was just a phase, but now that he's in his 40s I'm not so sure!"

"Dude, come over right now. I just coughed up a hairball that looks exactly like Jerry Garcia."

Smelling Salts at the Petrol Station.

"...Even Death himself went through a 'Glam Reaper' phase."

"Thanks for sitting through the encore."

One night, Albert got haunted by a Heavy Metal demon.

"Is it wrong that I miss Jerry Garcia more than my parents?"

'Well, son, the bad news is that one day you'll become fuel to power cars. But the good news is you'll go for $5 a gallon!'

'And this is our research staff: Brad covers autos, Cathie covers Big Pharma, and Keith knows heavy metals.'

No, I'm afraid I don't know any songs in the death metal genre.

Thanks and Giving

'Just which heavy metal did you say Edwards is researching?'