Grammar Dissenters Gifts

"Well there's no way I'm going to say 'whom'!"

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

I will study my speling words...

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

Punctuation Police

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

Someone who knows apostrophes

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

"Let's fall in love and live in the subjunctive."

"Nuts to you, too."

Desert $2.75. See? -- It wasn't a typo.

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

Lessons in Prehistory.

Conflating Science and Grammar. The boy threw the ball. What grammatical role does "ball" play in this sentence? An object in motion!

"Sorry I'm late. I overslept." "Is that even a real word?"

"So, hw ws yr smmr?"

Contemporary English Lesson: The Cat was Sat on the Mat.

"It's not fair! I only got 100 on my English test!"

'There it is, 'Twerk', right next to 'Twerp'.'

"You can use the alphabet to text. You can use the alphabet to tweet. Why can't you use the alphabet to spell?"

"You have no idea what it's like to be a 'just between you and me' person in a 'just between you and I' world."

Harv's general clumsiness with prepositions comes back to haunt him.

"I've just invented the question mark."

'I hope you ain't got no tax up here!'

"Today I came across antiderenuclearizationalityness."

Sometimes Y Turn

Ironing Punctuation

The First Sentence Fragment: 'Hey, don't -'

"We're developing a plan to fix this."

'Do you always have to shout? Well? Do you? Huh?'

THE REPORT: Some of this is brilliant, but that can be fixed.