Graduating To A New School Year Gifts

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

'This has been a drill. Had this been an actual test you would have been instructed...'

"Eventually, you have to stop visualizing yourself doing well on the test, and actually do the test."

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

A resourceful girl, Cynthia hoped to get credit in both Earth Sciences and Culinary Arts with her ozone layer cake.

Evil Exams!

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

The best PE teacher in the World.

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

"When I grow up, I don�t know whether to be a stunt amn or a train driver"

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

"I've outgrown my backpack."

'Yes, grammar rules do evolve over time, but making up your own to 'stay ahead of the curve' won't work in this English class!'

Examinations.

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

'Your report card grades are poor. Maybe you should stop building model airplanes. The glue is getting to you.'

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

I love PE.

"There are days when I wish we'd never agreed to him changing his spots"