Grade Achiever Gifts

"I see you got an A+++ in science."

I should be a writer when I grow up...

'But I thought you would be pleased-an 'A' plus in sex education,Dad!'

"I got an A+ on my math test! I'm updating my resume."

"I can't believe it...I got a 'B' average this year. Do you know what that means?"

"My teacher forgot to congratulate me on my great math grade. She was too busy calling Ripley's Believe It Or Not."

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

The Bookworm

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

Overjumpers

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

'Mom, Dad! Look what I created in lab today!'

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

'What's play?'

Exam

"Doing your homework may lead to a job that has homework."

Professor Wiles grows insufferable.

U of Debt

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

'May I be excused? I just checked my college investment portfolio online, and I feel sick.'

How come rich kids do so well on SAT tests? Their parents give them books, fancy trips, lessons and

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

His Master's Thesis.