Government Representative Pillows

"Someone from the federal government called and offered us a million dollars not to plant corn."

'Good afternoon, sir -- � I represent the Government, and....', 'Sorry -- I've got troubles of my own.'

Your government 'representatives'

'Good afternoon, sir -- I represent the Government, and....', 'Sorry†I've got troubles of my own.'

"This is the most important election of our lifetime."

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

I love Lawyers

What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'Frankly, our dental plan bites.'

"Who wrote this "Law of the Jungle" nonsense? It is highly biased in favour of predators!"

'I think I'll become a lawyer.'

'You can't fire me! -- This is a right-to-work state!'

"I actually saw ten gay characters on television this week—which almost balanced out the 2,174 straight characters I saw."

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

A man with Dwarfism is reading Little Women.

'Our union contract keeps us from cutting salaries, but nothing prevents us from charging for parking.'

Congratulations Strike Over!

"With the fortune we have spent in technology, informers and spies around the world, how is it possible that you still haven't found where the heck is Wally?"

The Canary in the Coal Mine

Lawyer's secretary has in boxes labeled: Before the Fact and After the Fact.

"Instead of raising the minimum wage, we should lower it to $4.00 an hour and create more jobs. Plus, low wages would encourage car pooling."

'Enough is enough. We're sick of being overworked and underpaid.'

"Great news, Mr. Corrigan. That large, life-threatening lump we removed from your back turned out to be your lawyer."

'It is a big day! Ten years ago, yout dad joined the union!'

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

When mediation failed, they tried meditation.

'It was more than my finest hour, Paltrow. It was my finest billable hour.'

"Hacking and eavesdropping are my top skills. I guess you could say I'm a good listener."

"And, if elected, I promise to put more black people in cartoons."

"At least he's honest about it..."

"Ha! Today we informed the boss about our rights!"

'Therapy in L.A.'

U.S. Manufacturing - Good News & Bad News

"We don't need no stinkin' unions...I saw it on the internet."