Government Gossip Seeker Pillows

"We're in."

21st century water cooler conversations.

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"National security adviser"

'I heard the Board was talking about kicking you, but I don't know if it's upstairs or out.'

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

"Hold everything! I just thought up a terrific loophole!"

"The water does taste a little funny. Maybe they added analgesics, to ease the pain of restructuring."

While you were out... the whole office talked about you.

'Somebody close the window. Those pesky drones are getting in.'

'We can't cut entitlements for federal employees. We're federal employees.'

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

'Voodoo economics was bad enough, but this voodoo foreign policy....'

'I'm here for 10 years and I don't have a clue about what this company is doing. I'm here just because of the gossip!'

Whitehall: Gave honest impartial advice

"I know this is just my humble opinion, but it's backed by the most comprehensive rumor, gossip and speculation this office can provide!"

'Take a letter,'

'Daddy! There's a Politician in my closet!'

'Nothing like some tea and symphony.'

"He's still bitter that bottled water ruined his reign as king of the water cooler."

'Lessee... He's keepin' my ol' guy at Defense, he's got a corrupt warmonger at State, a tax cheat at Treasury, an' the old Marc Rich pardon guy at Justice.... Nope -- I couldn'ta done a better job myself!'

"I had half a date last weekend."

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

Real Congressional reform's a must.....

'Forget about me - what can you tell me about the new CEO coming on board?'

"Facts are good, but we need all the rumors, gossip, and speculation to fully understand the situation."

"...I have the oddest 'earliest memory' and I wanted to share it. It's just as wekkm I guess. Knowing some man secretly attended my first birthday party has caused me to question my parentage all these years....Especially since Mother Park made me promise not to tell Father that the potted plant was acually J. Edgar Hoover."

"There's a rumour that someone may be resigning today."

A big announcement is coming at work.

"Of course, I'm not suggesting that you should also bail."

"I hear he's getting six figures a year."

"Call a meeting, Miss Pendleton. I want to hear some Corporate Creole."

CONGRESS, 'Okay, so you've been censured -- you've got to get right back in there and start legislating before you lose your nerve!'

When government regulations go too far.

'The girls in the office said you were very energetic in bed - the lying bastards!'