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Cheese

"You're the lid to my pot."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

Important Food Groups

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

Heimlich maneuver, Gastric bypass surgery, Liver transplant.

"Waiter... my entrée fell over."

I told you I got us the best table in the house. Pizza.

Join me for dinner?

Haute Chinese

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

"My secret is having a ton of money to buy the best ingredients."

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

"Your next pilgrimage must be to a bodega for milk."

"Sorry about the delay, sir. The manager is interviewing chefs at this very moment."

"It's this trend that leads us to believe we should supplement our oil commodities with investments in some of the Earth's rich vinegar and crouton reserves."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

'Good thing you ordered a double portion.'

Cut out and keep your own Chef

"You see, I don't believe in eating fast. I believe in savoring. I....hey, stop looking at my food!"

'Pass the grey stuff.'

'There was sizzle but no steak.'

"Whatever is quickest - I'm starving!"

A restaurant with a "Main Dining Room" and a "Room for Dessert".

'Jingling your change won't get us a better table.'