Gossipy Companion Gifts

'Hey! Have you heard the awful news?!'

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"I heard they mate for life."

Diving Cat.

Of course your master calls you 'Man's best friend'. As your attorney I advise you to get it in writing.

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

'There's a bench over there why not sit down and rest your weary mouth?'

'You had better eat those intestinal organs or there's no dessert for you!'

"I like you because you have absolutely no agenda."

Best friends without borders.

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

White Wine Wisdom (2)

Pixie Dust $2.00 A Handfull

"Solitude is so much better if you have someone to share it with."

"Listen, and I'll explain it to you again..."

"He's my escort, and he's a teddy bear."

'Whatever happened to that platoon of GIs you used to pretend to be at bedtimes?'

"I touched another squirrel's nuts. Any other questions?"

'I'm sick and tired of begging!'

"Henpecked?! Don't get me started about being hen-pecked buddy!"

"Talk? Hell, after a few drinks you can't shut me up."

'No talking' sign at a fishing site.

Opposing viewpoint.

"You know, after all these years of giving you advice on all. Things personal and professional, it occurred to me that you've never actually asked for my opinion."

"As you can see this is pretty embarrassing so I'd appreciate keeping it between you, me and this fence post."

Why Men Get Angry and Why Women Get Angry

"The doctor said I need to shop around for a casket. I asked for a second opinion and he suggested cremation."

"Good morning, world!"

"Sure, it's disgusting, but it's nice to have something that needs me."

McHappy