Good News Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Joe gives 'em the bad news, and I give 'em the good news, just like 'good cop - bad cop'!'

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

UK border controls relaxed.

"I can't decide what I fear the most, Putin's Russia or Putin's America."

Oligarchy

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Meet the Enemy

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Our Two Parties, Explained

Turkish Democracy

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

Man Reading Laptop.

"As I see it, 'Crazy politics' - like not voting on a supreme court nominee - is better than a complete government shutdown."

Matryoshka/ Russian Gas Cylinders

Armageddon

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

"I'm Lester Holt, and this, is date night."

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

"Er...nothing much has happened yet today...."

Fear of news.

'...Next election voters will have a choice of democrat, republican and 'generic'.'

Trump Destroying U.S. the Postal Service

"Wow. . . is that you, Mr Erdogan. . . Mr Kim Jong-un. . . Mr Putin. . . Mr Maduro. . . Mr. Bin-Salman. . . Mr al-Assad. . ."

'What I have to do first?!'

Capital Tours

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

Idlib, Syria - The final stage

Reporter #6: television.

'Hey!! What gives, there's nothing but a bunch of squiggly lines on this newspaper.'

'Mr. President, I have a question, where's the mens' room?'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."