Golf Newbie Gifts

Golf - "Are you new to the game?"

Mulligan's first mulligan.

'I've always wanted to try this - hand me one of those bat things...'

"It's a special golf bag for beginners - It has a built-in GPS."

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Kid uses his violin as a golf club.

"Next, I'd like to play 'Guantanamera.'"

'If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them closer to my hands!'

Olympics create interest in curling.

'You've never played golf before, have you?'

"Gym for regular people" "No intimidating trainers!" "Lo-tech" "Less is more!" "Not plastic" "Fluffy and scented" "No mirrors" "Full service restaurant"

'Hey, Dad! How about a round of computer golf?'

Clock Face Golf Set

Hole in forty-seven.

"Since you're a computer geek, I suggest lifting the box the weights came in."

"I told you I wouldn't be any good at this game. Look, I've gone and hit the ball down one of those little holes again."

No wonder kickboxing seems so hard.

'In that case I'll do nothing!'

'I decided it was time to be more active when my wife started dusting me twice a week.'

'I'm no good at push ups.'

'Remember I said almost anyone can learn to play golf, well you're the almost.'

'I'm here to sign up for a membership since the muscle shirt didn't work.'

"They told me to consult with a doctor before beginning an exercise program."

Caution - Student Driver.

'The fat loss pills don't work if you eat 845 of them a day!'

"I'm going to bed, I have an early tee time tomorrow."

Billy strip: dad's exercise won't last.

A tennis lesson for a hockey player. Skates are a poor footwear choice, and putting ball into the net is not the object of the game.

'Yes, hon, your stance looks great. However, that's the tee marker. The ball is over here.'

These trainers are rubbish...I've had them for three weeks and I'm still fat and unfit!

"So, let's see what your fitness band says today."

"Remember to keep your head down."

Egg Golf

x"It wasn't a bad swing, but you're still moving your head."

"This fitness app predicts pulled muscles and a lot of crying. I'm assuming it's you it's referring to."