Golf Lover Gifts

Very busy at Indian call centre. Laid-back in UK office. Man asks: 'Could we outsource tea-making?'

'I've been sitting on it for days and days and nothing happens!'

'If it doesn't let up a little by the time we get on the back nine, let's call it a day.'

'...and twenty-two mulligans.'

There are more things to life than golf--but I ignore them.

Centaurs

"Well done!"

'I know it's awkward, Peterson, but legally our club cannot bar him from membership. ... Maybe it's time for you to let go of the past.'

Golf Ball Meatball

"It's the old story. East Hampton isn't big enough for both of them."

'Aren't they restricted at this club?'

Giraffe putting.

"Twenty seven shots, first hole. I think we'll call that a dodo."

The mailing lists you're on says who you are

Golfer about to hit an agg

'Your guy looks a little nervous.' 'Yeah,i know. It's the first time he's ever played in front of such a huge gallery.'

Golfing in the snow.

Penguins playing golf on a whale.

'Fore.'

Rodin's Golfer, Rodin's Divot

'Don't you think you're carrying this 'oversized' thing a bit too far?'

Snake on golf course

'I'm not quitting! Who knows if i'll ever get another chance to break a hundred!'

'Have you found any golf balls in there.'

'I hate all that hip hop music.' 'Yes, I'd rather play golf or watch cricket.' 'Oh no...great white sharks.'

'We come in peace. We're just looking for a place to dump our planet's nuclear wastes.'

"Look! George just made a sink hole in one."

"This is great. I've been playing miniature golf so often I almost forgot what regular-sized golf is like."

Impeach!

"I feel there's a golf between us Ian."

"Don't drink and drive. Don't even putt."

"I'm noticing more water hazards this year."

"I've seen iceberg proposals for garages, swimming pools and cinemas...but a nine hole golf course?"

"Mom says you are going to play in the sand."

"I say another mile and we forget it. It was only a ball from the practice range anyway."