Golf Graveyard Guru Pillows

'He lived and died for golf.'

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

No-Work Orange

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Bernstein's got himself a driverless club

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

Executive golf with Newton's cradle

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

It can be taken up at any age....

Input From The Front Office

Golf lessons

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

"This guy's a terrific defensive lineman. I once saw him chase down a quakerback for nearly 40 yards before sacking him. It was in a shopping mall, but still..."

"Awfully quiet... Must be a big game on!"

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

'I don't care if you do need practice hitting out of the sand. The cat needs her litter box!'

Mark Gastineau

'I didn't have a glass ceiling I had to break through... I had a golf course I had to conquer.'

'The water hazard holds little fear for Jesus.'

'It looks to me like they come in peace.'

"I didn't mean your day wasn't hard, too."

Snowman Football Fan.

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

"So is that a slice of a hook? I never know which is which."

"On the weekend I finally beat the club pro...so I don't need you anymore!"

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

"Oh no, it's gone in that silly little hole again."