Golf Club Manager Pillows

"Just give me a minute, Mr. Vice-President, and I'll try to explain the difference between contributions to the Nature Conservancy and greens fees."

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

Golfer Shouts at Ball to Go Into Hole.

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

"The goal is to hate yourself."

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

The Golfing Accident

Bernstein's got himself a driverless club

"I really have to exercise more. I went from yelling 'Fore' in my 20's, to yelling 'Wow' in my 30's, to yelling 'Ow' in my 50's."

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

It can be taken up at any age....

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

Golf lessons

"Getting the ball in the hole on the first swing is good isn't it?"

'When I said address the ball I didn't mean like that!'

The Amateur Golfer

'It will be a difficult adjustment, but it doesn't mean you can't still live a full and rewarding life, say, in the library, or even a miniature golf course.'

How's My Drive?

'Do you have any golf balls that are not attracted to water, sand or trees?'

The Uncle Vinnie Insomnia Open

"How do you expect him to grow up to be a pro if he doesn't start young?"

'What makes you think we want to sell you son.'

Site of new Super Gamblers Anonymous.

"You're way too strong Dad: You've overshot the green by about two hundred metres..."

"This next song's about spreading risk in a volitile market by diversification"

'OK, be the ball, be the ball, be the ball'

'Don't ask me, I've never got one in a hole either.'

"Okay...just this once...but no more practice swings!"

"There goes the merger between Brigg's corporation and Ludlow industries!"

Sports Sponsorship "What do you mean he lost?"

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

'Wait! Better give me the big one.'

Psychologist to patient: 'I'm afraid there's still not a lot we know about choking over 2-inch putts.'