Gods T-Shirts

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

Dog Walking Services

'That was fun!'

Painting by the numbers for adults

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

Love a Mutt

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

"This the first time you guys ever installed an above-ground pool?"

"Measure twice, cut once...and curse three times!"

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

'I found the termites!'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

God's Subcontractors

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

Another All Steel Home Built By Wit Construction.

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"Well, yes, it's not what you would call a practical nest, but my wife insisted on using an architect..."

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

Nerd tryouts.

'The housing market may be flat, but pillow-fort construction is blooming!'

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

'Yes I know I'm intelligent and famous, but I'd trade it all for a good old belly scratching.'

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."