God Seeker Gifts

Priest And Aliens

"Good game."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

Squeezing the Free Press.

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

Press Freedom

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'Don't just sit there thinking. Meditate.'

Letters escape from a caged book.

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

'The meaning of life is dog food.'

"Needs to get a life"

"All we have left is standing room only."

Zenemies.

My God, I need to fart.

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

'A sitcom has to be quirky or formulaic. There is no middle way.'

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.