Goals Enthusiast Gifts

Wayne Rooney

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Go! Means NOW!

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

And here's the office floor plan. The numbers indicate the recommended sequence in which to step on people on your way to the top.

"I can't wait to introduce you to all the people I used to be friends with, before I started spending all my time with you."

Not thinking BIG enough: Nickel & Dime Bank.

'That's the first cubicle I ever worked in.'

"I've finally arrived. The C.E.O. stopped saying 'who the hell are you' whenever he sees me."

Westview High School Soccer League Victory Dinner

If a moo can rise to the top, so can I.

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

The best goalie in the world!

"Okay...let's concentrate on discussing strategy during halftime."

Goalkeeper makes the wrong save.

"You'll find I'm highly motivated and ambitious...oh, is this your desk?"

Punishment for the kicker.

"He's a psychopath with megalomanic tendencies...I like that in a candidate!"

"It's a long term goal."

"Keep up the good work and there'll probably be a nice promotion in it for me."

"Look at her...Gracie is intelligent, optimistic, ambitious..I wish she was one more thing."

I'm willing to start at the bottom and work my way up to your job..

Wall Street has a one way arrow upwards.

'Oh no...I'm living the dream.'

'In five year's time?... I see myself on that side of the desk telling you it's a great shame, thanks for all your hard work, but I'm going to have to let you go!'

What is possible/what is probable.

"There's no denying that you are ambitious but we are looking for someone with more dress sense."

'I realize money can't buy happiness, so I'm just trying to improve the exchange rate.'

"Shape up, son! You want to be a dung beetle the rest of your life?"

'You'll have to decide - do you want to be top management in a small pond, or bottom management in a big pond?'

'Shouldn't you be somewhere clawing yourself to the top, or something?'

"I started out on a molehill - What about you?"

Desk at the Horizon

'He's the best goalie we've ever had!'