Goal-getter Wordsmith T-Shirts

Football anagram: Curse straw mat (Answer: Marcus Stewart.)

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'As a famous writer, could you do something to help jumpstart my career?'

A bar selling 'crafty' beer is more popular than a bar selling 'craft' beer.

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

'Instead of 'You're entering a world of pain', try 'This won't hurt a bit.''

"Here it is - my novel. I'll be interested to hear your compliments."

Anna Burns

"The working title needs work."

"I guess the next time someone asks if I need something spelled out for me, the answer will be yes."

Rider's Block: Well I'll be. I've completely forgotten how to start this thing.

"And so on and so forth..."

"He's very disciplined about his writing. Three hours staring at a blank screen every morning and four in the afternoon!"

"Eddie, thanks to GPS, we no longer say your stocks are dropping. We say 'recalculating'."

"Well they say everyone has a book in them."

"See this thingamabob attached to your whatchamacallit? That’s the doohickey I was afraid of."

Accounting's poet laureate.

'Your intoxication beauty has made me forget my problems, my inhibitions, my wallet. Would you mind paying for the check?'

Rebellious Typewriters

'Goodness me referee one really must question your visual acuity.'

'The ladykin lived in a mickle biggin of cipolin.'

“This particular variety was incredibly full-bodied.”

"I need a five letter word that starts with 'Ca'."

Lemonade and counsel

"Oh hey look, it's the world, asking me to write more poetry."

'It sure didn't pay to increase my vocabulary that time!'

'...it's a spirited, yet lightly delicate little stock that shows signs of aging into exquisite maturity...'

Judge: 'Because of your Drive-by shooting,and shameless Looting; I'm not giving you Bail,you're going to Jail; You did the Crime,now you can do the Time!' Poetic Justice A rhyming Judge

"What kind of ambition is that - to be a war poet?"

"It's C-A-R-P festival."

'Let's get outta here. This place is nothin' but treble.'

'A little flinty with a blackcurrent boguet, medium tannin, a slight hint of the sea, with merlot overtones and an after taste that becomes okaey with a hint of liquorice...'

'Will you (swearing) shut the (swearing) up? -- I'm trying to work on my children's book!'

"The house of Chardonnay, sir - it's a young wine and a bit fruit forward."

I feel as if an interlude is coming to an end, Rosencrantz, and a new chapter begins anon. Stop using archaic words!! Fie! I have an appetency to force the world to bethink itself of anon.