Gluten Sleuth T-Shirts

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

"...I should have seen it coming...The busboys, the waiters, the dishwashers, the maitre d', all stealing shrimp, caviar, lobster, but ah, the strawberries, that's where I had them?"

'Another sad case of an over dose on uncut sugar cereal.'

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

A Complex Carb.

"Your chocolate biscuits and cakes are getting smaller - and where's your sweets aisle?"

Horse meat scandal.

"Oh, there will be an investigation!"

Full fatHalf fatVirtually fat free.

'Do I have a story to tell about Novox Genlab!'

"If you eat gluten, we have a ton of it in the back."

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten, or extra gluten."

"There's our cure for the munchies! Gluten, we love your pizza!!" "You're our hero, gluten."

'If you haven't been taking your vitamins. What have you been doing with them?'

'You're lucky you can't read.'

Sugar-coated riboflavin yellow #5 fructose surbosic-carboblutonic flakes.

'It appears that 'reduced fat' means high fat, 'lo-fat' means plenty of fat, and 'fat-free' means some fat.'

'Who's your Daddy?'

'Police. We have reason to believe you've been hacking into your neighbor's computers and stealing their recipes.'

'Well you can tell Dr. Zimler that you don't have Dalnik's syndrome, and, in fact, I think you have Zimler's syndrome.'

"It's a game changer. . . carrots and hummous batons but we've managed to make them out of sugar."

'Wow, Professor Jones, that's an impressive back-of-the-envelope calculation!'

'Bravo Professor, you stumbled upon the one fact that makes sense of it all. Unfortunately humanity is not permitted to know that the Universe was designed by a committee of ducks.'

After the curevac disaster: German overnment now invests in a serious pharmaceutical company.

'OK, remain calm. Who's missing? Milk? Eggs? Cheese? Where'd they go? How much do they know? And will they talk?'

'How do we bake such delicious large muffins that have only 20 calories? Easy, false advertising.'

CIA Cafeteria: 'It's nice of you to ask, but the recipe is classified.'

'If you think about it, would you give him a coffee with 17 spoonfuls of sugar in it?'

"It's called The Pastry Shop Mystery. A real Whodoughnut."

"No thanks. Do you know how much sugar is in those things?"

'You haven't confirmed the Superstring theory, Blumenkraft - this is a whisker from your beard!'