Globetrotting Conversationalists T-Shirts

"Passengers, as we begin our descent, you may now suddenly act open and friendly to the person beside you."

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

'I said, 'I'd like to see the chef!''

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

"I understand it all started when he ordered extra toppings on a pizza."

Religion & Economics.

Imaginary boyfriends are best.

"Bob's into politics. Date Night is more like Debate Night."

'According to my Dad, bosses are just like headmasters. The only difference is that they give you money every month.'

'I preferred it before you started taking Prozac.'

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

'I'm very impressed with how you effectively dodged every one of my questions.'

"You are going on a long journey. You will throw your back out putting your bag in the overhead. You will never recover from jet lag. It will rain every day. You will lose your passport. Your flight home will be cancelled."

"Phil is my Vice President in Charge of Snappy Comebacks."

'Whoa, Buddy, I think you've had enough...'

"I remember when you could order a cup of coffee in two or three words."

'And he's so-o-o-o knowledgeable about wine. He must have spent an hour telling me about his trip to Chardonnary.'

Not quite Beverly Hills.

"What is it about us that makes only crazy people want to talk to us?"

"Not to be a killjoy, but this happened on our property. Are liable?"

'Did someone forget to circle before dinner.'

'Yes that's right I ordered 2 doubles. Why, did you want a drink too?'

"We could always adopt, like, 50 little bunnies from Asia."

'Say 'Nessage in a gottle.' one more time and I'm putting you back in your box.'

"Hey, this is on me!"

'Nine out of ten doctors think excessive drinking is bad for your health.'

"O positive, why?"

"I'm filled with the holiday spirit. Single malt scotch."

'So I talk to myself! What is it to you?'