Globe-trotter Gifts

'Yikes! I wonder how long his flight has been delayed.'

'We can't stay here, and your father has connections in China.'

Made in China.

Globalization.

Columus being laughed at for not knowing which continent he is on

Incontinental Airlines: 'Okay sir, will that be a window, an aisle or a bathroom seat?'

"I'm flying to Los Angeles to use their wonderful video conferencing facilities."

'I'm afraid in our global economy, it's no longer possible to get away from it all.'

Doing an equipment inventory back in five months.

Time in the airport is all measured against the time in New York City.

Health costs soaring in the U.S., Americans are going to other countries for medical care.

"Does it seem like American tourists are less arrogant than they used to be?"

Backpacker

Workaholic's Wives on Holiday

You Are Here

"If you don't get on that plane...there's also the 5:43, then the 9:27, but that's got a layover in Atlanta, then..."

'Haves' and 'Have Nots'

'As a general rule of thumb, if your only assets are your frequent flyer miles, you don't need to create a trust for your children.'

Off to see the world

"It says here that in your last job you did a lot of traveling."

'He's been back packing around India and doesn't he want everyone to know it.'

'In the event the cabin loses pressure, masks will automatically drop from above, providing oxygen--at $5.95/minute.'

Excess Baggage: Anyone who thinks business travel is glamorous should have a talk with a business traveler.

Emigration towards alemania.

"How can I sleep when people in other time zones are already up and making money?"

'I thought we were dining 'international' tonight?'

"Don't blame me, the tourist brochure says it's one of the World's great spectacles."

"Now they've been vaccinated, we can jab 'em."

Arrivals: 'Check out our web site at www.air.arr'Departures: 'Check out our web site at www.air.dep'

Santa Claus waiting at an airport's baggage claim for his sack of presents.

"Why are all the pages in your resume blank?"

'Dysentery or non-dysentery section?'

Shrunken heads $3

"I think your problem is that you are bipolar."

'Made in Australia?'