Glasses Misplacer Pillows

"Well, I'll be darned. They had just walked away."

"I lost my reading glasses, so pick something wordless."

"Hmm, most common places old farts leave their glasses and car keys!!"

"Talk nerdy to me."

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

'Where's my glove?'

"That would've gone better if I'd gotten here with my gift list instead of my spelling list."

"I'll help you find your glasses after I find my horn."

'You're not supposed to block off an area to look for your contact lens.'

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'

Norman's decision to raise chickens first in the back yard, then the front yard and eventually the living room would cause great dismay the day his car keys went missing.

'I think the eye doctor got my prescription glasses mixed up with somebody else's.'

"How did I never notice before, Peter! Without your glasses you look just like Spider-Man!"

'My eyesight was getting worse, but thanks to my new glasses, I can play 'Monkey see, Monkey do' again...'

'He was a lousy watch dog until we realized he was near sighted.'

'Your Majesty, the Pretender to the Throne is here.'

I add 1,000 steps every day just going back to my car to get the mask I was supposed to put on."

'Lost the keys?! You IDIOT!...'

Contacts vs. Glasses

'Wow! He must really work out!'

'Can I use your mantra today? - I forgot mine.'

"This next song is about being unable to find your car keys. . ."

Sorry, what did you say? This new double glazing will be good for noise reduction!

'I'd like to buy a vowel.'

"Have you seen my eyes?"

Shouldn't you clean the windscreen?

"I can't find my stupid phone, so leave a message..."

"Any idea where I left my reading glasses?"

It appears that the victim was a nerd

"So your soccer team lost...big deal! I lose things all the time!"

'I can't find my keys!'

'You know that rare specimen you lost - I think I've found it!'

The Tour de Pants.

"Forgot my keys."