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Christmas Tree

Happy Easter

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

I love Museum Shops

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

'The service is so much better when you dress as royalty.'

Never give a cow a giant straw.

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

'Are you going exploring or retrieving a duck?'

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

'Brand X, the wine for those with indiscriminate taste.'

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

"Honey, I love celebrating Christmas! I love all the food, the sweets, the Christmas tree and the presents, but our bank account hates Christmas!"

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

Emergency Underpants

Toast kidnapper.

"I just dialed 1-800-BAGUETTE."

House for Sale.

'The Ugoola's wheel is bigger than ours!'

"Wake up."