Ghost-busting Guru Gifts

"I have eight spirits coming through."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

Halloween may be a little different this year.

Ghost School.

"It's not the paranormal activity that bothers me so much as the passive aggression."

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

Halloweek: Eating candy seven days straight.

'There's an imposter among us!'

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

'Egad! It's the ghosts of sanity past!'

'It's only fair Geraldine. I had to meet your parents.'

'It's only the library ghost - he was a great poet but a failed novelist.'

'Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

"Lately, I've become more spiritual, and less religious."

"Restless spirit, we don't know who or what you are, but thank you for your amazing Wi-Fi, and for keeping the signal strong."

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

"You put it on backward, dear."

"I'm the ghost of Christmas Tree Future, and honestly, it doesn't turn out well for you."

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.

Ghosts from around the world

Lost Property - Missing Head

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

Haunted museum

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

Ghosts from around the world.

"You see a haunted house, I see a house with good bones."