Germaphobe Squad Pillows

"Stupid flu season."

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

The new normal

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'Gesundheit.'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

Wash your hands

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

'I hope what I have isn't catching.'

"No Hand Sanitiser"

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

"The penicillin looks good."

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

Soap Versus Coronavirus

'...and I'm telling you that Budgie sneezed!!'

'We've got a new DNA database...'

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

'I know it's not around too much this season but I think I have swine flu!'

"Aways the victim."

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

Want to hear a secret? Every time they put a nut in my mouth, I give it a little lick.

'Colds! Sore throats! Flue! Did anyone ever tell you you're a hypochondriac?'

'I'm afraid you've got a computer virus.'

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

There was a nasty bug going around.

"I could probably keep spring-cleaning till next winter."

'If I keep bringing diseases home from school, maybe I shouldn't go to school.'