Germaphobe Squad Pillows

"Stupid flu season."

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

The new normal

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'Gesundheit.'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

"No Hand Sanitiser"

'I hope what I have isn't catching.'

Wash your hands

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

Soap Versus Coronavirus

"The penicillin looks good."

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

'...and I'm telling you that Budgie sneezed!!'

'We've got a new DNA database...'

'I'm afraid you've got a computer virus.'

"Aways the victim."

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

'Colds! Sore throats! Flue! Did anyone ever tell you you're a hypochondriac?'

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

'I know it's not around too much this season but I think I have swine flu!'

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

"I could probably keep spring-cleaning till next winter."

There was a nasty bug going around.

'If I keep bringing diseases home from school, maybe I shouldn't go to school.'

"Ouch!... That hand sanitiser is a bit feisty..."