Geopolitical Gossip Pillows

This Special Report on Cuts in U.S. Military Spending Comes Through A Grant From Vladimir Putin...

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

Russia Money Laundering

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

Terrorism leaves Iraq and moves on to new places.

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

Ursula von der Leyen Surrounded By Donald Trump Heads on Island

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"To join OPEC you must be a country and filthy rich in oil."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

Nato Membership

Ah Democracy - Just Like Home

“Rumor has it, it’s happy hour.”

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

'Social media makes things so much easier to be a gossip."

'I wish there was some way we could reduce emissions here.'

Dictators Consuming the World

'Botox...'

Yanis Varoufakis and Wolfgang Schauble

Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un Summit

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

"Remember that lovely couple of scarlet macaws we met in Puerto Jiménez? They split up!"

'Voodoo economics was bad enough, but this voodoo foreign policy....'

Weditorials

Whitehall: Gave honest impartial advice

'Take a letter,'

Pie chart of pub conversations

The Original Gossip Columns

'Just a minute, girls, while I get rid of an eavesdropper.'