Genetic Jokester Gifts

Printout in a genetics laboratory forming dna double helix

Shocking Scientific News! Plumber's crack IS hereditary.

"If your mom had hooked up with me at spring break instead of Rich Jenkins you'd have much better cartilage than this."

Frank's Laundry and Dry Cloning

'Well, if you DNA made you do it, I'm sentencing your DNA to thirty years in prison.'

Genome Technology Christians - "You're just a common or garden born again christian!"

'Miss Davis...Send in the clones.'

Genetic Information Mapping

Dog: "Have you noticed? He looks more like me all the time."

"I hope I age as well as you, Dad. Except for the neck."

A Cat

"One day son, all of this will be yours."

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

Press Any Key. No, Not That One.

Pyramid (Drawn from memory) (Pretty accurate)

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

"Are you sure this is a 'Flu virus?" "See for yourself...it's nose is running!"

"Someone has hacked into our Computer."

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

Physics Improv. "I now vill be taking suggestions from ze audience..."

One of Many California Gene Pools

A fisherman reacts as he sees a drone flying over the lake with a fishing line into the water below.

'Don't you hate it when they look BACK at you?'

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'

'Sir, we're receiving a signal from space. It might be a candidate for possible intelligent alien life!' 'Nice going you ninny, you butt-dialled Earth! Now they're going to know we exist!'

"Information is moved via neurotransmitters from neuron to neuron via the synapses into the brain where it is then retrieved by the memory via a slap on the back of the head."

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

"It's the formula for a black hole."

At first, Moses was worried about the manna from heaven.

'But it may be easier to understand the meaning of bioengineered life.'

'Catch a pair of chimps and do a complete makeover on them.'

'Lately, I've been thinking a lot about evolution. My theory is that it all points to 'survival of the fattest'.'

'What are you talking about? ? how can you have half a quantum theory?'