Generosity Strategist Gifts

'It's better to give than to receive - if you can deduct it!'

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

Restaurant. One thing you can still get for a single dollar is the waiter's opinion of you.

"Tia Carmen, if times are tough, how come you're giving money away?"

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

"Now at this point reality intruded."

"All yours, Buddy. I'm ALREADY living on house money."

"We're making progress."

"Am I worried about going belly-up? Well, I can't get my fingers uncrossed and I sleep face down."

"Should I just give him the £2.50 or does that look cheap. . . would he say anything if I just walked past?"

'It's not a 20 year low! We've been in business only 19 years.'

'Can't you stop being charitable, we are on vacation.'

Child Testing Santa Claus's Generosity

"I'm going to need to make multiple stops."

Charity mugger

"Civic responsibility, ethics, and a dedication to the people we serve; they're killing our business."

"What do you get for the man who complains about everything?"

"Peters, make a joyful noise."

"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."

'The problems with charities is that they are always needing donations.'

"And the Haves, you might say, are divided into the Gives and Give Nots."

Boss with Angel and Devil on his shoulders - 'They're not employees, but we do have a symbiotic relationship.'

"Christmas is almost here! Remember, it's the greatest happiness to give. And I want all of you to be very happy this year."

'No kidding? You're the bluebird of mutually assured destruction deterrants?'

Thanks And Giving.

Nothing Personal: Gifts for your business adversaries.

"Don't be so mean...give him some money!"

'... and last, but not least, a big Christmas bonus for Daddy to make sure I get what I want.'

"He's your rich uncle. What do you buy the caveman who's hunted and gathered everything?"

'So maybe it is feel-good legislation- What's wrong with feeling good?'

"Next time, before buying expensive gifts, be sure there's enough money left to rent your own camels."

"Let us through! We're charity fundraisers."

Half of those who made no donations last year 'do not trust charities'.

"That's Ed's brother. He gave us the shirt off his back. Unfortunately he's still in it."