Generational Satirist Gifts

"I'm Generation Z. Nice to meet you."

Fourth Generation Money.

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

Why Cows Leave Home

"An Iraq attack is one thing, but I'm not sure about a Persian incursion."

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

"I got a chocolate bar and gum!" "What the #!@* is 'CBD oil'?!"

"It came... it grew... it made Nana say bad words... 'Ow! You rotten #@!!×!' The invasion of the thistle"

Bubbie Selfies

'He was an impressionist. Like that Alistair McGowan...'

"Who knew a lifeless box could spread such fear? It came from the mailbox."

Annuals, Perennials, Centennials, Millennials

"We're just pleased he can still get into the Christmas spirit."

"Without a doubt... the first sixty!"

"Relax kid, you're going to be for awhile."

"Greatest Band?"

"Mom, does granddad want me to run away? He's playing that Disco music again!"

"When I was your age I used my beak."

'All you do is stare at the TV. When I was a kid we have to be content with staring at the radio.'

'Ms. Trent, would you go down to the third grade and get one of the computer techs?'

High pants/Low pants.

"Things were really different when I was growing up. Childhoods today are much longer."

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

"This is my mom's phone. Instead of a hashtag, it has a pound sign."

"Ha! This younger is so absorbed in social media that he cannot appreciate his youth, unlike I, aging millennial, who cannot appreciate his thirties."

'I'd always hoped that I'd leave this mortal coil surrounded by my beautiful, loving family,,, so can some of you ugly ones move to the back'

Punks with blue/pink hair meet old people with blue/pink rinses.

'I'm glad your mother stayed with us last week, it gave me a great idea for a horror story.'

"Look, I'm really having trouble with my computer. I need it to work and I need it now...and your fancy schmancy jargon isn't helping much."

"My dad says at some point in your life, fashion isn't important anymore. You basically wear nylon slacks and guayaberas every day."

'Your diary? How come you didn't just blog it way back then?'

'I'm ninety-seven years old and I still have all my own teeth.'