Generational Humorists Pillows

"I'm eighteen, Clay. I don't have to work out."

'Can't we raise the baby, and then make him pay for our Social Security?'

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

Why Cows Leave Home

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

"Are you one of these youngsters who has a very short attention span?"

You're certain you've had plenty of experience serving in a fine dining restaurant?

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

"In my day I played a pretty mean cowbell."

Bubbie Selfies

"I got a chocolate bar and gum!" "What the #!@* is 'CBD oil'?!"

"Who knew a lifeless box could spread such fear? It came from the mailbox."

"It came... it grew... it made Nana say bad words... 'Ow! You rotten #@!!×!' The invasion of the thistle"

Annuals, Perennials, Centennials, Millennials

"We're just pleased he can still get into the Christmas spirit."

"Greatest Band?"

'All you do is stare at the TV. When I was a kid we have to be content with staring at the radio.'

"Without a doubt... the first sixty!"

"Mom, does granddad want me to run away? He's playing that Disco music again!"

"When I was your age I used my beak."

"Relax kid, you're going to be for awhile."

'Ms. Trent, would you go down to the third grade and get one of the computer techs?'

High pants/Low pants.

"I'm Generation Z. Nice to meet you."

"Things were really different when I was growing up. Childhoods today are much longer."

"Sorry, grandpa, but wiggling the antenna won't restore your cable and Internet."

"Ha! This younger is so absorbed in social media that he cannot appreciate his youth, unlike I, aging millennial, who cannot appreciate his thirties."

"It's a key to the city, it's not supposed to be bling, 'Kanye!'"

"This is my mom's phone. Instead of a hashtag, it has a pound sign."

Punks with blue/pink hair meet old people with blue/pink rinses.

"Look, I'm really having trouble with my computer. I need it to work and I need it now...and your fancy schmancy jargon isn't helping much."

"My dad says at some point in your life, fashion isn't important anymore. You basically wear nylon slacks and guayaberas every day."