Geeky Gourmand Gifts

"I'm a computer programmer. After a few more glasses of wine, that'll seem more interesting."

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

"I come here for the pepper."

Recipes from the Jean-Paul Sartre Cookbook

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

"Well, he's a celebrity chef and the celebreties love his cooking."

"Fresh pepper?"

"Sorry about the delay, sir. The manager is interviewing chefs at this very moment."

'How would you like that? Medium, rare, or wrapped in plastic on a foam tray?'

Sushi Train Spotters

All You Can Tweet Restaurant.

'Are these mushrooms or toadstools? And why are you holding a stomach pump?.'

Sandwich snob.

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

"Our chef specializes in atomic gastronomy."

'No, no... I ordered a tart, not a tort!'

'Are you ready for dessert?'

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."

Dijon Vu

'Mind if I join you? I told your wife that if she didn't like the way I cook, she could have a run at it herself.'

"Of course this is a pizza! Man, I've always been a rebel!"

Menu. Specials. Soups. Salads. Drinks. You can't call this an internet cafe just because you have pull-down menus.

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

'I forgot to bring my lunch - could I clone yours?'

No matter where. . . everyone gravitates toward the kitchen.

The experience was exhilarating. You could eat like a pig and weigh nothing.

Capturing a Cook

'It seems the environment people, the health department and the food and drug administration all have reservations about his place.'

Endangered Entrees

Why Chemists shouldn't take their work home "I can't believe it's not b-b-vegetable mono & dyglycerides!"

'He's very fussy about his food.'

"All we've come up with so far is that new meatloaf."