Geek Whisperer Gifts

"Oh my, it seems John was talking to the guys in IT again!"

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

Computer Expert

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

Fixing the Computer.

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'Well look, here come the hackers!'

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

Computer help.

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

Two computers are having a conversation, but stop when their owner enters the room.

'Well, look who has stock in Genomes-R-Us.'

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

"Ever killed a man?"

'Tell me more about your programmer.'

'The computer can talk to terminals all over the country. Bentley thinks it's talking about him.'

'Decoding is often 1, 14, 20, 9, 3, 12, 9, 13, 1, 3, 20, 9, 3.'

Computer whisperer.

"The biggest downside of funding IT startups... is being called 'dude'!"

we wanted to get rid of all the 'superbugs' but they were the only one's who understood the new it system

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

WWW.World.com

The fax machine had stopped and they did not know why.

You will do as I command...'It had a power surge.'

Happiness is a warm warm iPad.

'It's just the microscope dream again...go back to sleep.'

"Sorry, honey, I can't talk now. I'm in the midst of some very intense negotiations with Bill Gates on the electronic rights to you and the kids."

"I just got an alert from our smart refrigerator. It's pleading with us to not stick anything else on it."

'Sometimes, when I'm feeling unappreciated, I'll fake a system-wide data crash.'

Information might travel at the speed of light, but the news still travels at the speed of sound bites.

"He fights me when I tell him to take a nap. When I reword it and say go reboot, he doesn't have a problem."

Man in office smiling in delight as various office equipment dances for him

Rudy, you bought me a high-definition camcorder. You shouldn't have. Is that you shouldn't have as in: It's just too thoughtful? Or, simply: You shouldn't have 'cause this gift stinks? I'm really blown away. Clarify!

'My Turing Machine doesn't understand me.'