Gastronomy Fan Gifts

Before/After

Pasta, Cookies, Antacids.

'Do you happen to have a scratch-and-sniff menu?'

Repair of gastronomic centers

Come dine with me!

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Counting ribs

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

Try to guess the continent dining...

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Important Food Groups

Kitchen Kapers

Benihana style of cooking.

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

The Streets - Night

Burnt or Raw?

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

OFA. Onion Farmer of the Year. I told myself I wasn't going to cry ….

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

"As you can guess, Rico is my role model."

North Fork, the town too tough to diet.

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

"Is the garbage fresh?"

Will work for Food Network.

'This is delicious. I'm glad I didn't try to order in Italian.'

A convenient attack of swine flu...