Gastro Thrill Seeker Pillows

"I'd like to try something different- something that takes a lot of guts to eat."

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

I wish I'd had the review.

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

'When you said this movie's about a fish out of water, I was expecting more of a light-hearted comedy.'

"For the first half hour, I was, like, really there. Enchanted. But I found the wild-quail confit so disappointing that not even the fig reduction on the poached pear could get me back."

Picasso

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

"Waiter, can you find out if this hair in my arugula salad is locally harvested?"

"Is there anybody there?"

Tunnel of Workaholics

"Excuse me but it's our food, can you make it sexy?"

In the Works: Eurocheese, Eurobread, Eurowine.

"I'm using this travel site to map out a trip to the land of Everything's Deep Fat Fried."

"What would you serve with toast?"

Napoleon Blownafart

Couple in restaurant, "Sorry it's slow, Chef's got the runs"

'As a gastroenterologist, what would you take for this soup?'

'Delicious. Mind giving me the recipe?'

Beer....Beer Fart.

"Have you folks eaten here before, or shall I explain the concept?"

Capturing a Cook

"I know you didn't order meatballs. That's the gravy."

Gastro Gnomes

'And thank you for a lovely evening!'

'I'm starved. Instead of a fly in my soup, make it a mouse.'

'A table near the wine steward, please.'

Sugar Maple: Regular/Calorie-Reduced

"Hold on ... I think a table's about to open up."

'Enjoy!' Restaurant

'Welcome monsieur et madame, may I take your coats, gloves and savings?'

"You'll find out what the chef's surprise is when you get your bill."

'Just mash them the old-fashioned way, Doris.'

'I'd appreciate it if you'd order the Chef's surprise. We don't get all that much excitement around here.'