Garden Gnome Appreciator Pillows

A young boy playing with a scythe

"Fancy running into you in a field of marjoram!"

I hope you had a nice summer.

'The neighbours have had a whip round for a new lawnmower!'

'Hmm, that would be great for grandpa.'

'This is what happens when you have short arms!'

Old watering can

'How do they know it's breakfast time? It's your garden clock, birdbrain!'

In the Garden of Andy

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

We practically live out here in the summer.

Show and Tell.

Watering the garden gnome

Drunk Woman Sees Pink Elephants in her Garden.

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'I'd invite you in but there's no room.'

Suburban street.

The Perfect Garden.

Animals looking at a map of the crops on a farm.

Bird sees coo coo bird emerge from birdhouse

"Ohh darling - how lovely..!!"

Beware of highly intelligent but extremely savage dog.

"I can't believe I threw all that away for a Cox's pippin!"

'. . . He's such a slime ball!'

You'll need all your energy when you get home.

"Found it when I was digging the garden...."

Gardening store selling Action-Gnome.

"Should I fix it or call it a water feature?"

"Genome, Bobby, not gnome."

"If this company can make an herbal soda...there's no reason why I can't make and sell my own too!"

Elf Farm

October: Brush all leaves into a neat pile to rot. They will make valuable plant food.

The G-nome Project (Mapping the genome).

'I think the postman has got lost again.'