Garage Owner Gifts

'When I ask what our inventory is 'What ever' is not an acceptable answer.'

"I'm having a little difficulty adjusting. The last place I worked was a lot bigger."

"This bill is the same as your estimate! What did'nt you do?"

"You need a new radiator. It's not your fault. It's not my fault. I blame the system, the cooling system."

'No it's not ?150 PLUS VAT - the ?150 is JUST the VAT!'

LOUIE'S GARAGE, 'I can go along with replacing the carburetor and the battery, but what's this $128.43 fcor a 'new warp nacelle'?'

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

'No, lets take this battery. It has a longer warranty.'

10-Minute Oil Change and 2-Hour Wait.

'Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God?'

Mechanic: 'A grinding sound, eh? Maybe she needs a new paint job.'

'You give him the estimate - you're bigger than he is.'

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

"Can you give me a rough idea of how much over the top your estimate will be?"

'New brake shoes? I love shoes!'

"OK, let's see. For starters, the guarantee only covers the muffler."

'My Plymouth Horizon keeps driving off into the sunset.'

'Step this way to buy our low cholesterol motor oil that will perform miracles in your car. As an added bonus, we'll throw in a free gas cap.' Act now.' 'Local garage owners questioned corporate's new marketing strategy.'

Car that makes a noise: 'Ka-ching'.

"Crap! I forgot to put my car in the garage again!"

Garage: if it ain't broke, fix it anyway

Dave's Discount Auto Repair...only an arm or a leg, not both!

Checking the oil in a car.

'It's our last resort.'

I got a car for the weekend!

"See that dog, Mr. Hendricks? That means you either have a shredded fan belt or your fuel pump is sucking air."

"That's no oil, it's my bottle of 1988 Chateau Petrus I spilled while checking your brake lines. That's gonna cost ya!"

Kwiki-Fix Garage. With add-on charges, this sum is much greater than the parts!

'Hey, pal -- We don't talk about the 'Car Guys' around here, okay?'

"My only suggestion is we freeze it and hope a future generation can repair it."

'You'll have to take your hybrid somewhere else. We only service real cars here.'

LOUIE'S GARAGE, 'I can go along with replacing the carburetor and the battery, but what's this $128.43 fcor a 'new warp nacelle'?'

Brake Repair Shop

Hank's Garage - "You were out of gas...that'll be two hundred bucks."

A mess of mechanics