Gambling Aficionado Gifts

This Week's Winning Numbers

Penny Stocks & Lucky Lottery Numbers

'Remember, guys... we've got to clean up this mess before the folks get home.'

"Floyd had two loves: Betting on the races and celebrating the holidays. Visiting the dog track dressed up as the Easter Bunny may have seemed a good idea at first..."

'His horse came in at 100 to 1 - last!'

"Oh, I see - had your fun and now you're off?"

"Cutting out the middleman."

"Carmen, my husband's been coming home in the middle of the night. I don't know what to do...."

'Look! - Oog has invented the numbers racket!'

Winning cherries,

IRS...No, we can't make it double or nothing so don't ask!

'Shall we spin the wheel to see how many napkins you get.'

3 - Card Monte Travel: 'Find the red queen you travel free!'

'It certainly puts the fun into getting your money out.'

Signpost with signs - Casino, Supercasino, Casinometro & Casinolocal.

"You owe us five more dollars."

'Sorry you lost 'Silver' at my casino, Kemo Sabe,'

'I can sum up the performance of my horse in one word, last.'

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

Man states that he has a sweepstake at his club but his wife thinks he means someone who is a sweep

"He loved Vegas."

A tortoise walks away from a poker game, having lost its shell.

Double Down

"He calls it 'Vegas' cause he's a 'Whale'."

"Oh, I almost forgot: This time, if you have a good hand, don’t say, 'Meowee!'"

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

Golfing Boss

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

'He always tees off like that. He used to throw the discus in college.'

Great moments in art dogs playing poker, cats playing Pictionary,

Earthlings, show us your sporting interests. This is golf. Hit the ball with the club. This is tennis. Hit that ball with the racket. This is volleyball. Hit that ball with your hand. Hitting, hitting, hitting. It's all so violent. How do you relax? We hit the hot tub.

The deadly sport of cobra staring contests.

Dog in casino.

"Yes, sir, Dave. Out here, under the big sky, I always get back in touch with who I am."