Galactic Tourist T-Shirts

Bezos in space

"You are here"

You are here!

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

"Before vaporizing this one, we need to file an environmental impact report."

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

Blue Origin

An alien dog hangs its head out the flying saucer.

"Going to Mars sounded like fun. Do you think we can get dad to finance it?"

Parking meter on the moon.

"Possible exception to Prince William's proposed halt on space travel." proposed halt on space travel."

'Great job Zork, we're lost... you couldn't find Uranus with both hands and a flashlight!'

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

It says, 'Billions of Babies on Board.'

UFO and snowman

"Ready. Aim. Pew! Pew!"

"Space wants to kill you."

"Last Year we went to Peoria."

"Are we there yet?"

Celestial Navigation

'You do have catastrophic insurance, but it only applies in case of invasion from outer space.'

Leonard Nimoy

Moon Souvenirs

"How can you claim to offer directions if you don't know the best way to Epsilon Delta VII?"

"We came to your planet because there are just not enough pickleball courts on our planet."

"I don’t know why we bother traveling—they just missed the entire Milky Way."

E. TR. AHS. PCNL.

"Man, they can't do anything right. Half the countries are underdeveloped. The other half are overdeveloped."

Commercial space travel is expensive.

UFO

'It's nothing personal, Donald; I just need more space.'

"So this is where it all ends up. . ."