Gaining Citizenship Gifts

Latinos in the USA

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

"Anachronism or not, it just ain't the fourth without the ribs and Willie Nelson."

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

Netanyahu versus Gantz

'It's the consistently defininative obscure obviation coupled with absolute commitment to incomprehensible policy objectives that I find appealing.

'We all shrink as we get older... You'll just have to be a little patient!'

"Well, it all depends. Where are these huddled masses coming from?"

A man with a walking frame breaks a wheel and hitches a ride with a man on a mobility scooter.

'I know I can train them to be thoughtful productive citizens if I can ever get past sit.'

Half French/half English.

Plastic Brits: 'Apprehend that fleetfooted alien and naturalise him for Team GB!'

'Face it dear, we are as old as we look!'

Citizenship test no 17, 'the t-shirt over head'.

'I see that you're a fully integrated immigrant to this country.'

"I used to be 'Unemployed Larry." But no more! Now I am 'Citizen Larry,' and over the next few months I will seek the bright light and open spaces of this beautiful country and ask for the wise counsel of its people."

American Flag

Statue of liberty holding a lighter

'How would Jesus register?'

'Britishness Test.'

"Right, you've got 17 pints of lager and 30 minutes...get going."

"I have to get a new guy. My immigration lawyer failed his citizenship test."

Superhero giving prisoners the right to vote.

'First you're older than the baseball players, then you're older than the president, then you're older than everyone on the Supreme Court...'

"I don't need to learn about ethics. I'm going to be a lawyer."

'Yes it's a long and illustrious family tree Mr Yousif, but what I really need from you is a passport.'

"I'm trying to figure out when I flipped from being a baby boomer to a senior citizen."

"Did you bring our birth certificates, photo ID, passport and citizen papers?"

'A Caesarian? - But I want my son to be a natural-born citizen!'

Presidential debate in the USA

"Good morning, Nice queue You've all passed"

"You've got the microwave, sauce and 15 minutes to make a traditional English Korma."

The IMPORTANT thing is that we only accept the people who'll fit in!'

Immigration Integration Evening - 'We're hoping to meet some east European builders.'

Us - Them.