Gag Gifts Gifts

The magic of April Fools' morning.

Jesus Suddenly Realizes It's Almost Father's Day

"Here he comes! Don't move."

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

Joke 'Joke shop'

"Duct tape fixes leaks in the office, too."

'A tool belt? -- you know I hate gag gifts!'

'All the demons chipped in to get Satan a gag gift for his birthday.'

Joke Shop product - Not Funny After 10 Sept 87

"I'm looking for a card that says 'You got exactly what you deserve, scumbag!""

"Every year it's the same old thing. Another pair of socks and another double chin."

"It's not a present for you. It's a present for me. . ."

"A valiant effort, Mike, but just accept that you're going bald."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Bubble Gum Farms.

'Colin's dying to show you how his renewable energy scheme works.'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

'It's a farton, fartoff lamp!'

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

"He won't eat anything but corn."

Clown's Cuckoo Clock.

Good Dentist ~ Bad Dentist

Lavatory Waterfall

'Hey, mac, is this your idea of glasnost?'

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

Egypt 1896. Dr Howard Prendergast and Percy Smythe discover the tomb of King Ahktuman the Practical Joker, proving conclusively that the ancient Egyptians were the first culture to use whoopee cushion.

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."

'I haven't had the urge for a cigarette for two days. How's the patch working for you?'

Paul McCartney, The Surgeon - "I want to hold your gland yeah, yeah, yeah..."

'...and don't think I didn't see that flying tackle.'