Future Supervillains Gifts

What super-villains get their kids for Christmas.

Scarpia from Tosca

Mighty Man Of Justice Is Born

'I've got a cape. I think I can make it.'

Inaction Figure

"You want to be a comedian? You can't be serious!"

'I can't wait to embarrass him when he's a teenager.'

"Sarge, he says he wants to make a 'fashion statement'!"

"…And just what do you think you're going to do with your silly death ray once you've finished it?!"

Evil Henchman Gets a Promotion.

"Say one Our Father Attenborough and three Hail Gretas."

Throg, Destroyer of Worlds...and cat.

"Aha Mr. Bond - you are in my power!....but instead of just killing you, I'll blether on and on about my plans for world domination so you have time to think of an ingenious way to escape my clutches..."

'Your father and I support your career aspirations, but we feel you need a new practice space.'

More Pardons

'Oh, sure, the boss has a menacing evil laugh, but it's his evil sob that I find most arresting.'

"Someday, son, all this will be your fault."

"Shouldn't you boys be out fighting crime somewhere?" "Yeah, yeah, whatever." "I could use another beer while you're up." "I ain't goin' on no airplane!" "Anyone pay the cable bill?" The A-Hole Team

'Dang, it looks like they have found out about my plan to take over the world...'

Yeah, that's mine - My mom puts my name inside my helmet in case it comes off.

"Sure we'll get in trouble, but our science grades will make up for it."

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

'After graduation, I plan on working in warrantless surveillance for the CIA. How about you?'

"You see 'The Man' devised this shrewd plan so more people can go to college and become doctors and lawyers and stuff. Now that they're 'productive members of society,' revolution is the last thing on their minds! I plan to make that my doctoral thesis wh

"Denying the climate change works perfectly! Just look around us! Everything is as usual!"

"I plan to retire when bank robbery becomes legal!"

"I'll be the superhero—you be the guy arguing about him online."

Caped Character

"I bet you're wondering what my other hands doing under this table right now."

"Don't get too excited. Getting a filling does not make you a cyborg."

Advantages of being bald # 3 - Evil villain movie parts.

Fridays For Future

"Well Mr Blofeld, it's gonna be a tricky job - especially the 100 metre, piranha-infested water tank..."

'Next time I cut the red wire...'

"He may be evil, but his breath is like air conditioning."