Future Hall Of Famers Gifts

Spring Training Camp. Have you ever thrown spitballs? Not since the league started testing saliva.

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

Exercising

The team video didn't spotlight my talents. I've hired my own film crew. They'll showcase my skills so college recruiters can see my strengths. Wow! How can the director pack so much into one little video? Great point! Daddy? Tell Steven Spielberg we're going feature length. Nice save!

"What do you want to be when you blow up?"

The game is tied, and this is the final inning because the sun is setting. I understand, coach, I need to get home before dark!

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'Don't you know who I am?...I've decided to pursue a career as a celebrity, so I'm developing the basic language skills used in the industry.'

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

Future Wrestler

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

"That' a wonderful picture, sweetheart. You know, maybe we should keep all of this garbage, in case you become a famous artist."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'According to this stop watch I'm not growing up fast enough.'

'When I grow up, if I don't become a pro basketball player, about about 'spin doctor'?'

'I can just see him twenty years down the road pitching for the Giants.'

"Sometimes, time travel isn't such a good idea."

'I see a bright future, a transformation: Beauty, wings, elegance...'

'When I was a youngster I was going to be a Rock GOD, but the allure of working with multi-denominational tax efficient offshore bonds proved too strong.'

'Not everyone can make it as a professional footballer!' 'I know dad, there are snooker and darts players...'

'Wow! Feel that kick! I'm buying him a football for his first birthday!'

"I like you kid, but you're really just a work in progress!"

'When do I learn to read and sign a huge NFL contract?'

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

I'm not worried about the economy. Me either! It's not like I'm going into banking, car manufacturing, or real estate. Totally! We'll still make the big bucks. May I ask doing what? Movie actress. Rock star. When you move to L.A., I'm not converting your bedroom.

'Play your best. There's going to be a scout for the ten year olds in the stands!'

'I understand the school has a policy of promoting from within, so I'd like to be considered for your job when you retire.'

Your brother's threatening to be a fat cat banker. Barf! I will do something socially useful with my life! That's my girl! When I'm a famous actress, I'll talk forcefully to "Entertainment Tonight" about my vegetarian diet! Maybe we should have had more children. Or non.

School children looking at different careers from magazine covers, each involving celebrity status.

'Don't feel bad. Maybe your son is just a late bloomer.'

Your Best Years/Your Uncertain Future