Future Bar Owner T-Shirts

"I'm just trying to keep the business going until I can get my liquor license."

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

Beer Stall

"A pint! I'll need proof, and that's human years, not dog years!"

Shaken not stirred

Best Before 5th Pint.

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"Have you seen my dad?"

"My wife left me. Then my hard drive died."

"... And to this day, she still blames the dog!"

It's our new twin-handle beer mug. It's for manly, two-fisted drinkers, as well as weaklings like you who can't lift it with one hand.

You said you wanted beer with hops !

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

The Reaper's Arms

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

Infinity Tavern

Bar: Now serving 24 hours - 'I want to get as wasted as you look.'

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

Dinner at the Jolly Sandboys (opening to Ch 19)

'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

The Endangered Species: Your Local Pub

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

'I can't find a dry martini anywhere.'