Fur Baby Aficionado T-Shirts

'$200 for bladder stones? NOW I know what they meant by 'precious stones'!'

"How adorable! I'd love to have one of my own but I'm so terribly allergic."

"No no, I said sit!!"

"Foster failure"

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"His real name is Major, but everyone call him GET DOWN!"

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

'Yes I know I'm intelligent and famous, but I'd trade it all for a good old belly scratching.'

"Look, children are just pathetic substitutes for people who can't have pets."

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

'Honestly, now that Tiger is neutered I'm perfectly happy just cuddling.'

"...do they teach manners at obedience school?"

Fur Baby

Cat Zoom Meeting

"Back when we got him, Rufus was a child substitute. Now he's just a dog."

"Your motivation is that you're a dog and it's food."

Upper East Side Dog Park

'I do not pamper the dog, now get out of his chair!'

Dog Looks Alarmed At The Vets.

Cat and owner sticking out tongues at each other.

"I think it's unfair to call her a "crazy cat-lady": She just loves all 63 of us..."

"Congratulations. It's a litter."

'Oh there you are...you naughty girl! What have you been up to this time?'

Pet Adoptions

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

"Yeah, going to the dog park is good, but I must prefer a more intimate walk with my Master..."

'In ancient Egypt, cats were treated like gods and in this house, it's pretty much the same: Come in friend...'

Dog Chow Mein

"What do you think you're doing? You play with me every day for 15 months, and out of the blue, you're going to work?!"

"He's a rescue."

"I need to go home now! I'm all out of pee!"

Woman welcomes back her cat but not its new kittens.

She'd decided to apply for a species change...

'You see, Doctor, we've never had any children...

"She never took to the leash."