Funny Phone Frustrations Gifts

'Yes sir, we still have Mr Edwards on hold from last thursday...'

Dawing your Cellphone

"That vulture just appeared and started picking at my phone. My battery must have died."

"You have reached the Office of Status Quo. Relax. No need to listen carefully. Our menu options never change."

Call centre musicians

'Please hold for an eternity...'

Hi honey, I'm on the plinth.

'Thank you for calling the Zepco mattresses hotline...'

"No one whose name is pronounced that way lives here."

"I'm not angry with you, I'm angry with life!"

Lost Dog

Armstrong, have you seen my phone? Indeed I have, minion. I've trained the caf

'He's busy right now but if it's important I'll wake him.'

Willie Nelson, hold music.

'If you've got a complaint, please press 1. If we can help you to find something to complain about, please press 2.'

Voice Jail

"This is NHS direct.You are in a queue,approximate waiting time is 4 hours."

'It's like caller ID. You get to see who's calling before you pick up.'

'The number you have dialled is your own, you will be billed a $25.00 moron charge.'

'I know you're there, Obama - pick up!'

When Cell Phone Users Go to Hell

"Your call is important to us, just not as important as whatever else we're doing."

"Give me a sec and I'll check your order."

"Your call is REALLY important to us, which is why we're going to spend a really... REALLY long time thinking about it before we answer."

"Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you."

"I'm keeping count of how many robocalls I get. What's sad is I only started today."

'No, you can't have another flip phone. You always leave the lid up.'

"His brains were fried before he started to use a mobile phone!"

"To talk to someone in Customer Service, press one, but we're pretty sure you'll want to hear our other 12 options. . ."