Funny Pants Pillows

"I hate golf...But I Like wearing silly pants."

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

"The Chicken: Just another body type that shouldn't be permitted to wear yoga pants."

Miss America IQ Pageant

'Are we there yet?'

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

"What? Don't yuck my yum!"

"Being the smartest girl in third grade is going to Melinda's head."

Bobbies library of jeans

"According to my calculations...school starts in exactly 20 days!"

Fat Kid 14- Gets re-animated

"I have an idea. How about I don't have to eat broccoli until I learn how to spell it."

"Do you have pants in XL?"

'I come from the future - any questions?'

'Everyone's using your theorem, Pythagoras. I told you you should have patented it.'

"OMG! I thought everyone knew that E=MC2."

MENSER the high IQ society

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

How does it feel to always be the smartest guy in the room, Dr. Kapuchnik? Usually, it feels pretty good. In this particular case, it feels like I'm cheating.

"When I said you could use other materials with the sand, I was thinking shells and driftwood."

"How come when I sleep funny I don't wake up laughing?"

"Those tights pinch and chaff. We're going commando."

'Can you do the dishes, love. I'll do the school run.'

'My husband wants to know if the sonogram can tell if the baby is a Red Sox or Yankees fan.'

Beard, socks and sandals.

Oh, Wow! With all this baby food flying around, I can't wait until he starts eating steak!!!

"Oooh, look — a penny!"

"He thinks he's so smart with his 360 degrees!"

'I reduce my stress with comfort food. Now none of my clothes are comfortable.'

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

"Aren't you afraid you might get too smart?"