Funny Food Appreciator Gifts

Menu Dating

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

Better Not Squash.

Cooking with Pierre

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

"Here's the pub-grub you ordered"

"Of course our GM vegetables are safe, Madam, they told us so themselves!"

'Trust me, Madam, that fish is fresh!'

"In addition to the menu, we have a few specials on the board."

"Tell me, is a single spaghetti a spaghetus or what?"

'Waiter...!' (there is a human in my soup)

'Of course I'd never have so much as looked at Timothy if it wasn't for his nose for truffles.'

'These are my dieting glasses. They magnify the food so I think I'm eating more than I really am.'

The Chef's dumplings were his speciality.

'You'd better cut it into six pieces I don't think I could eat eight!'

Waiter, why are there TWO flies in my soup? The second fly is the first fly's attorney.

"Say hello to my little friend!"

"Eat your greens. . . and your pinks and yellows and blues."

"The reason your meringue is crushed is because I distinctly heard you tell me to 'Step on it'."

Sellers and Inspectors in Cuba

"....My wife and I are strict humanitarians."

'The hair in the soup provides fiber.'

Sick wife teaches husband to use can-opener

Winter lunch.

"It's not my fault he keeps forgetting to bring food to the potlucks."

'Do you do the squished up little balls that taste of fish - or are you the wrong ethnicity?'

Welcome at the Healthful Restaurant. We allow neither cholesterol, GM food, colourings, dust nor guests.

'Please, no - not the live fettucini!'

'The thought of your biscuits brings a lump to my throat.'

"The Normans are coming and I can't decide on whether to pour a simple consomme on them, or a more complex bisque."